This post was originally published August 12, 2008 and has been slightly updated/modified for 2009. You can read the re-published version of Part 1 here.
When a family close to us decided to stop giving and receiving presents at Christmas a few years ago, I’d say we were surprised (but not really surprised) and in a way, disappointed. Especially me, as my #1 Love Language is definitely Gifts (which means I like receiving, but equally I love giving!). It was hard for me to imagine not getting to pick out that perfect gift for those that we love at Christmas, as we’ve always been conditioned to do. It never dawned on me that perhaps my perception of Christmas was in need of some tweaking.
For this family the decision was simply an outward expression of their desire to celebrate Christmas for what it should be, Jesus’ birth, and not for what it has become, American Consumerism. I definitely could understand this side of the argument, and respected their decision, although for me, I didn’t feel like I could give up on the giving/receiving completely.
Fast forward to the present {2008}, where I’ve been reading and thinking a lot about simplifying life– in many forms, be it ingredients (real vs. artificial, for example), products I use, space I imagine I need to live in, amount of energy I use, things I own, etc.– basically doing a gradual life philosophy overhaul.
In my research, I stumbled upon a book that caught my interest, Hundred Dollar Holiday: The Cause for a More Joyful Christmas. I checked it out at the library, read it in one sitting (it’s pretty small), and agreed with almost everything in it. I’ll elaborate on this book as I continue this series, but for now, let’s converse a little about holiday gifts…
I’ve got some great (simpler) gift ideas coming up for those of you who want to continue the tradition (like my family does), but I’d love to hear stories, ideas or philosophies from any point on the spectrum.
What are your gut reactions to cutting out gifts at Christmas? Could you do it? Would you want to do it? Have you come up with any new/modified gift-giving traditions? Come on, be honest… no arguments/judgments, please, just your own opinion on the topic.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Somewhere along the way, I came across this statistic & it really hit me.
“78% of Americans wish that the holidays were less materialistic and a similar percentage believe that gift giving is awarded too much importance.”
This year, for the first time, we are not exchanging ANY gifts. Yesterday we sent out our letter to the family, sharing our reasons and asking them to please check us off their list, and so far the response has been all positive and in agreement.
I’m like you- my first love language is gifts. I know we could never cut out gifts, and honestly, I wouldn’t want to. Each year I try to make handmade gifts as much as possible, and this year won’t be any different. Hubby and I have also set a strict spending limit. Along with our gift-giving we try to do a service project for someone in need, and we always buy gifts for toys for tots or another organization. And this year, we are beyond thrilled to be able to buy gifts for and continue family traditions with our little Hazel!
This year we are also trying to simplify gift giving/receiving. For me, the focus on the gifts has recently become stressful and taken the focus off Jesus. I don’t know why, maybe because I’ve been trying to talk more about the reason for Christmas with the 2-year old, but I’ve been even more sensitive/bothered by how Christmas is represented in the stores, in books, on tv, etc. It makes me want to make sure we are putting the emphasis on Jesus’ birth as we celebrate in our home and to celebrate it in a way that expresses that we’re thankful for Him.
I would love to reduce the materialism of the holidays in our family, but its just not going to fly on my husband’s side. I think I could convince him of the rationale..and work towards simplicity in our home… but we have his sister’s 3 kids and their 5 kids to buy for too. There are certain dollar amount expectations and there will be bad mouthing by his sister if we don’t meet those and of course, make sure each kid gets the exact same value and quantity of presents. It doesn’t matter if one kid wants something that is $30 and another wants two things at $15, everything has to be equal. It drives me nuts, but I’m not sure what to do.
We have moved our gift-giving to Thanksgiving. We’ve talked about it with our kids and decided we’d show our appreciation and thankfulness for them on Thanksgiving and leave Christmas to focus on Jesus. Why hasn’t America done this all along?